December 19, 2006
First Up: Rosie O'Donnell, who recently infuriated the Asian community with her politically incorrect impression of the Chinese language says that she is "truly, truly sorry." To prove it, she promised to never again appear on the show "Nip/Tuck"
Item 2:  A drug company in Trenton, New Jersey has created a chewable birth control pill.  It comes in three flavors:  cherry, spearmint and extra-tangy sperm.
Item 3:  A new study has found that doctors should spend more time performing a colonoscopy.  They also suggest buying the patient dinner before the test, and snuggling a little bit afterwards.
Item 4:  A Sad Note
Richard Carlson, the self-help author who wrote the best -selling book "Don't Sweat the Small Stuff" passed away at the age of 45.  Funeral services are pending because his family is fighting over the time, place and flower arrangements.
Item 5: Nicole Ritchie has been charged with more crimes stemming from her recent DUI arrest, including not meeting the weight requirement for riding without a car seat.
And Finally:

The Bing Crosby Joke of The Week
A couple was celebrating their fiftieth wedding anniversary at a temple.  "What is the secret to a long marriage?" the Rabbi asked the husband.  "Treat your wife with respect, spend money on her, and travel for special occasions," replied the husband. "Where have you traveled?" asked the Rabbi. "For our twenty-fifth anniversary," replied the husband, "We went to China."  "Excellent," answered the Rabbi, "Where will you go for this, your fiftieth?"  "Back to China," answered the husband, "to pick her up."