March 7, 2006
First Up: According to a new poll, 47 percent of people believe that the government will protect their most personal information.  The other 53 percent wanted to know, “How the hell did you get my unlisted number?”
Item 2:  This year’s Academy Award winner for best original song was “It’s Hard Out Their For A Pimp,” from the movie “Hustle and Flow.”  It beat out the original song from Brokeback Mountain  “It’s Hard Out There In The Pup Tent.”
Item 3: 

Showtime’s lesbian drama “The L Word,” has introduced a perfume, called, “L.”  Their slogan is, “It’s Strong Enough For The Woman Who Is The Man In The Relationship.”
Item 4: 

Fun Fact You Should Know The most frequently shoplifted item is The Bible.  The second?  “Visit Hell On $9 A Day.”
Item 5: Dateline--Spotsylvania, Virginia
The sheriff said that he will no longer pay for undercover cops to receive sexual services while investigating suspected prostitution.  He knew there was a problem when suspects were told, “You have the right to remain silent, and I’ll keep my trap shut, too.”
Item 6: Dateline--Hingham, Massachusetts 
A retail store has apologized for an advertisement that offered a sale on “Wife-beater” shirts.  They also planned to discontinue the sale of ”She Had It Coming” sweats and the “Burning Bed” sheet collection.
And Finally:

The Bing Crosby Joke of The Week
An Irish girl knelt in the confessional and said, “Bless me Father, for I have sinned.”  “What is it child?” asked the priest.  The girl answered, “Father, I have committed the sin of vanity.  Twice a day I gaze at myself in the mirror and tell myself how beautiful I am.”  The priest turned, took a good look at the girl and said, “I have good news.  That isn’t a sin, it’s just a mistake.”