Click on a year to see the reports: 2008 2007 2006 2004 2003
November 25, 2003
First Up:
According to USA Today, Michael Jackson's camp says that the molestation charges against him are a lie. Of course, his camp consists of his lawyer and eight little boys in one sleeping bag waiting for a weenie roast.
Item 2:
Dateline - East St. Louis, Illinois A man got his middle finger caught in a pay phone's coin-return slot and was taken phone and all to the emergency room. It took doctors three hours to free him. Apparently, the man was engaged in a little foreplay before the real phone sex began.
Item 3:
Democratic Presidential hopeful Dennis Kucinich, who is tied for last place, told USA Today that, "I'm fully ready to be an overnight success." He went on to say, "Who am I kidding? I can't believe I got this interview!"
Item 4:
Dateline - Hawaii Bethany Hamilton, the thirteen year-old surfer girl who had her arm bitten off by a shark, said she plans to surf again, exclaiming, "I can't wait to Hang Five!"
Item 5:
The relationship between forty-something Demi Moore and twenty-something Ashton Kutcher is getting serious. According to inside sources, she got him a gold promise ring and he got her a frog and a shiny nickel.
Item 6:
Japanese scientists say they have identified a new species of whale. The scientific name is "Brandoannanicolerickilakeassess."
And Finally:
The Bing Crosby Joke of The Week: A man goes to confession and says, "Bless me father for I have sinned. I had sex with seven different women last night." The priest says, "Take seven lemons, squeeze them into a glass and drink the juice without pausing." The man asks, "Will that cleanse me of my sins?" The priest says, "No, but it will get rid of that shit-eating grin."

Bob Zany's Goodwill Tour Bob Zany's
Goodwill Tour

Click here to see the photos!
2019 Dates
and Venues

May 2
Laugh Factory
Hollywood, CA
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May 3
Laugh Factory
Long Beach, CA
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May 6-9
Howie Mandell's Comedy Club
Atlantic City, NJ
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May 10-11
Murray's Irish Pub
Menominee, MI
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May 14-19
Laugh Factory
Reno, NV
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May 22-26
The Improv at Harvey's
Lake Tahoe, NV
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May 31-June 1
The Nugget
Taping Carson City Tonight
Carson City, NV
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June 15-22
Norwegian Cruise Line
June 23-25
The Ice House
Clean Comedy Challenge
Pasadena, CA
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June 28-29
The Nugget
Taping Carson City Tonight
Carson City, NV
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July 11-13
Helium Comedy Club
Indianapolis, IN
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July 15-21
Brad Garrett's Comedy Club
MGM Grand
Las Vegas, NV
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July 26-27
The Nugget
Taping Carson City Tonight
Carson City, NV
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July 26-27
The Nugget
Bob Zany in Concert
Carson City, NV
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Aug. 8
Del Lago Casino
Waterloo, NY
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Aug. 19-25
Laugh Factory
Las Vegas, NV
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Aug. 30-31
The Nugget
Bob Zany in Concert
Carson City, NV
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Aug. 30-31
The Nugget
Taping Carson City Tonight
Carson City, NV
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Sept. 18-22
The Improv
Lake Tahoe, NV
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Sept. 27-28
The Nugget
Carson City, NV
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For information: 818-314-9577
Email: abcmess57@gmail.com

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