Click on a year to see the reports: 2008 2007 2006 2004 2003
February 17, 2004
First Up:
Mattel Toys has announced the 43 year relationship between Barbie and Ken is over. A spokesperson gave no official reason for the break-up but confirmed that Ken has moved to Massachusetts to be closer to GI Joe.
Item 2:
According to leading researcher, children influence their parents to spend billions and billions of dollars on products. The number one item? Condoms!
Item 3:
Forty year-old Susan Shapiro has written a book called "Five Men Who Broke My Heart." It's about the messy relationships she's had in the past. No truth to the rumor it was originally titled "Bitter Old Whore".
Item 4:
A Sad Note Copywriter James Jordan, regarded as advertising's greatest sloganeer, passed away at the age of 73. He coined the phrases "Ring around the collar' and "Zest-fully clean." Per his wishes, he'll be buried in a T-shirt that asks, "Got Dirt?"
Item 5:
Dateline - Hollywood Michael Jackson's mom, Katherine, ahs opened a restaurant on Sunset Boulevard. She said it will feature recipes that have nurtured the Jackson clan, including "beaten To A Pulp Roast," "Exposed Breast of Chicken," and "Children's Salad With Undressing."
Item 6:
There is talk that Senator John Kerry has sewn up the Democratic Presidential Nomination. Experts say that Senator John Edwards might be his running mate. I've come up with some possible campaign slogans for the duo, including: "The Real Deal With a New Deal Chaser," "Kerry/Edwards: Not Just the Name of a Porn Star," and, "Two Johns Don't Make a Right."
And Finally:
Senator John Kerry, recovering from prostate surgery, was told he couldn't be sexually active for six weeks. Joe Lieberman called to wish him well, Al Sharpton called to offer him prayers, Howard Dean called with a get well message and Bill Clinton called Mrs. Kerry.

Bob Zany's Goodwill Tour Bob Zany's
Goodwill Tour

Click here to see the photos!
2019 Dates
and Venues

May 2
Laugh Factory
Hollywood, CA
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May 3
Laugh Factory
Long Beach, CA
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May 6-9
Howie Mandell's Comedy Club
Atlantic City, NJ
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May 10-11
Murray's Irish Pub
Menominee, MI
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May 14-19
Laugh Factory
Reno, NV
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May 22-26
The Improv at Harvey's
Lake Tahoe, NV
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May 31-June 1
The Nugget
Taping Carson City Tonight
Carson City, NV
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June 15-22
Norwegian Cruise Line
June 23-25
The Ice House
Clean Comedy Challenge
Pasadena, CA
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June 28-29
The Nugget
Taping Carson City Tonight
Carson City, NV
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July 11-13
Helium Comedy Club
Indianapolis, IN
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July 15-21
Brad Garrett's Comedy Club
MGM Grand
Las Vegas, NV
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July 26-27
The Nugget
Taping Carson City Tonight
Carson City, NV
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July 26-27
The Nugget
Bob Zany in Concert
Carson City, NV
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Aug. 8
Del Lago Casino
Waterloo, NY
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Aug. 19-25
Laugh Factory
Las Vegas, NV
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Aug. 30-31
The Nugget
Bob Zany in Concert
Carson City, NV
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Aug. 30-31
The Nugget
Taping Carson City Tonight
Carson City, NV
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Sept. 18-22
The Improv
Lake Tahoe, NV
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Sept. 27-28
The Nugget
Carson City, NV
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For information: 818-314-9577
Email: abcmess57@gmail.com

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