Click on a year to see the reports: 2008 2007 2006 2004 2003
February 24, 2004
First Up:
Red Cross workers visited Saddam Hussein and told him that the hole they found him hiding in has been filled with dirt. "That's a coincidence," replied the flea-bitten freak, "Fellow prisoners have been taking turns filling up my other dirt hole."
Item 2:
Dateline - Richmond, Virginia Sate health officials warn that Winter Vomiting Disease in on the rise with symptoms lasting two or three days, or about as long as a John Kerry stump speech.
Item 3:
Dateline: Bend, Oregon Residents have asked the city to reject any new so-called "Big Box" stores in their neighborhood. Included on the list of forbidden Big Box stores are Wal-Mart, Home Depot and Just Panties For Plus-Size Women.
Item 4:
A Sad Note Jan Miner, the actress who played Madge the Manicurist in the Palmolive commercials passed away at t the age of 86. Per her wishes, she'll be buried at sea, so her family can finally say, "She's soaking in it."
Item 5:
Dateline: Howard, Wisconsin A married couple ducked behind a refrigerator when bullets began to explode in their oven. The husband told police, "I'm not over-reacting when I say my wife's cooking is going to kill me."
Item 6:
A member of The Student Bondage Club at Iowa Sate University was charged with assault, and the whole group is facing strict penalties. The president of the club could not be reached for comment because he was tied up at the moment, but he did release the statement, "Spank me, spank me, I've been a baaaaaaaad boy!"
And Finally:
Two tall trees, a birch and a beech are growing in the woods. A small tree begins to grow between them. The birch says to the beech, "Is that a son of a beech or a son of a birch?" The birch says he can't tell. Just then, a woodpecker lands on the sapling. The birch says, "Woodpecker, you're a tree expert, can you tell if that's a son of a birch or a son of a beech?" The woodpecker takes a peck at the small tree and replies, "It's neither a son of a beech or a son of a birch. It is, however, the best piece of ash I ever put my pecker in."

Bob Zany's Goodwill Tour Bob Zany's
Goodwill Tour

Click here to see the photos!
2019 Dates
and Venues

May 2
Laugh Factory
Hollywood, CA
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May 3
Laugh Factory
Long Beach, CA
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May 6-9
Howie Mandell's Comedy Club
Atlantic City, NJ
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May 10-11
Murray's Irish Pub
Menominee, MI
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May 14-19
Laugh Factory
Reno, NV
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May 22-26
The Improv at Harvey's
Lake Tahoe, NV
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May 31-June 1
The Nugget
Taping Carson City Tonight
Carson City, NV
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June 15-22
Norwegian Cruise Line
June 23-25
The Ice House
Clean Comedy Challenge
Pasadena, CA
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June 28-29
The Nugget
Taping Carson City Tonight
Carson City, NV
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July 11-13
Helium Comedy Club
Indianapolis, IN
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July 15-21
Brad Garrett's Comedy Club
MGM Grand
Las Vegas, NV
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July 26-27
The Nugget
Taping Carson City Tonight
Carson City, NV
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July 26-27
The Nugget
Bob Zany in Concert
Carson City, NV
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Aug. 8
Del Lago Casino
Waterloo, NY
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Aug. 19-25
Laugh Factory
Las Vegas, NV
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Aug. 30-31
The Nugget
Bob Zany in Concert
Carson City, NV
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Aug. 30-31
The Nugget
Taping Carson City Tonight
Carson City, NV
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Sept. 18-22
The Improv
Lake Tahoe, NV
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Sept. 27-28
The Nugget
Carson City, NV
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For information: 818-314-9577
Email: abcmess57@gmail.com

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