Click on a year to see the reports: 2008 2007 2006 2004 2003
July 11, 2006
First Up:
According to the US Census, by mid-October, the USA will add its 300 millionth person. There is an 80 percent chance that this person will be an immigrant boy with the last name Jolie-Pitt.
Item 2:
Enron founder Ken Lay died of a heart attack at the age of 64, proving that sometimes God doesn't work in mysterious ways.
Item 3:
Keith Richards has signed on to play Johnny Depp's father in the third installment of Pirates of The Caribbean. The role is an upgrade for Richards as he was originally cast as, "Third Skeleton From The Right."
Item 4:
A Sad Note Police found an 84-year-old California man living with the body of his wife who had passed away two weeks earlier. The Sad Part? He was finally getting some.
Item 5:
Activist Cindy Sheehan is on a two-month hunger strike that began July 4. People think the strike is yet another of Sheehan's protests against the Iraq war, but actually it's because her 30-year high school reunion will takes place on September 3.
Item 6:
Warren Buffet was asked why he gave his children a measly one billion bucks each. He said, "I gave them enough so that they can do anything, and enough so that they can do nothing." I agree. If I had only one billion in the bank, I'd still be calling in on Tuesdays.
And Finally:
The Bing Crosby Joke of The Week After having all of his teeth pulled, a minister had new dentures made. The first Sunday with his new choppers, he only preached for ten minutes. The second week, 20 minutes. But on the third week, he preached an hour and 25 minutes. When a member of his congregation asked how he did it, he replied, "Well, the first Sunday, my mouth was too sore to talk. The second Sunday, my dentures were hurting a lot. On the third Sunday, I accidentally grabbed my wife's dentures, and I couldn't stop talking!"

Bob Zany's Goodwill Tour Bob Zany's
Goodwill Tour

Click here to see the photos!
2019 Dates
and Venues

Aug. 8
Del Lago Casino
Waterloo, NY
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Aug. 16
Sea Pines Golf Resort
Los Osos, CA
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Aug. 19-25
Laugh Factory
Las Vegas, NV
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Aug. 30-31
The Nugget
Bob Zany in Concert
Carson City, NV
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Aug. 30-31
The Nugget
Taping Carson City Tonight
Carson City, NV
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Sept. 6
Performing Arts Center
Munster, IN
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Sept. 7
Green Acres
Kokomo, IN
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Sept. 8
The Bruin House
Pittsboro, IN
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Sept. 18-22
The Improv
Lake Tahoe, NV
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Sept. 28-Oct. 12
Norwegian Cruise
Out of NYC
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Oct. 18-19
Dry Bar Comedy taping
Provo, UT
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Oct. 22
Throckmorton
Mill Valley, CA
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Nov. 6
The Whiskey House
Ankeny, IA
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Nov. 7
L-Treyn's Bar
Keokuk, IA
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Nov. 8
The Capitol Theater
Burlington, IA
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Nov. 9
The Main Event
Mason City, IA
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Nov. 12-17
Laugh Factory
Reno, NV
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Nov. 21

Rockford, IL
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Nov. 22
The Pixy Theater
Edinburgh, IN
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Nov. 23
VFW
Sullivan, IL
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Dec. 13-14
The Grove
Lowell, AR
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Dec. 31
Kwataqnuk Flathead Resort & Casino
w/ Willie Tyler & Lester,
Jimmy "JJ" Walker
Polson, MT
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Jan. 4
w/ Jimmy Walker
Edgeton, WI
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For information: 818-314-9577
Email: abcmess57@gmail.com

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