Click on a year to see the reports: 2008 2007 2006 2004 2003
August 22, 2006
First Up:
A bust of Hillary Clinton was unveiled at The Museum of Sex. Bill complimented the artist for capturing Hillary's sexual traits: "Stone-cold and worthless from the neck down."
Item 2:
As part of the democrats strategy to win back Congress, lefties are trying to smear Wal-Mart. According to one unnamed source, "Americans have been paying low prices for way too long. When we are in power again, we will put a stop to this practice immediately."
Item 3:
Nicole Kidman, along with 75 other celebrities, is taking a stand against terrorism. This is the second time Kidman has battled a menacing, larger-than-life enemy. The first? Her divorce from Tom Cruise.
Item 4:
Question of The Week: If you have casual sex with actress Marlee Matlin, is it because you just want a little peace and quiet?
Item 5:
Northwest Airlines apologized for a pamphlet they gave employees titled "101 Ways To Save Money" The suggestions included taking shorter showers, buying jewelry at a pawn shop, and picking through the trash for "good stuff." Along with the apology, corporate suits offered the following Helpful Hints For Healing: "Get over it!" "We all got problems" and "Quit!"
Item 6:
Several Chinese women were detained by US Customs Agents after they discovered their underwear soaked in heroin. They believe they may have been trying to smuggle drugs in the country or they just recently had sex with Rocker Keith Richards.
And Finally:
The Bing Crosby Joke of The Week A man dies and appears at The Pearly Gates. St. Peter asks the man, "Have you done anything of merit?" "Well, I was on a camping trip, and I came across a gang of bikers threatening a woman. I went up to the biggest, scariest, most heavily tattooed biker, smacked him on the head, kicked over his bike and ripped out his nose ring." Then I said, "Back off, or you'll have to answer to me." Impressed, St. Peter asked, "When did that happen?" "A couple minutes ago."

Bob Zany's Goodwill Tour Bob Zany's
Goodwill Tour

Click here to see the photos!
2019 Dates
and Venues

May 2
Laugh Factory
Hollywood, CA
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May 3
Laugh Factory
Long Beach, CA
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May 6-9
Howie Mandell's Comedy Club
Atlantic City, NJ
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May 10-11
Murray's Irish Pub
Menominee, MI
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May 14-19
Laugh Factory
Reno, NV
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May 22-26
The Improv at Harvey's
Lake Tahoe, NV
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May 31-June 1
The Nugget
Taping Carson City Tonight
Carson City, NV
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June 15-22
Norwegian Cruise Line
June 23-25
The Ice House
Clean Comedy Challenge
Pasadena, CA
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June 28-29
The Nugget
Taping Carson City Tonight
Carson City, NV
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July 11-13
Helium Comedy Club
Indianapolis, IN
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July 15-21
Brad Garrett's Comedy Club
MGM Grand
Las Vegas, NV
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July 26-27
The Nugget
Taping Carson City Tonight
Carson City, NV
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July 26-27
The Nugget
Bob Zany in Concert
Carson City, NV
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Aug. 8
Del Lago Casino
Waterloo, NY
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Aug. 19-25
Laugh Factory
Las Vegas, NV
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Aug. 30-31
The Nugget
Bob Zany in Concert
Carson City, NV
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Aug. 30-31
The Nugget
Taping Carson City Tonight
Carson City, NV
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Sept. 18-22
The Improv
Lake Tahoe, NV
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Sept. 27-28
The Nugget
Carson City, NV
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For information: 818-314-9577
Email: abcmess57@gmail.com

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