Click on a year to see the reports: 2008 2007 2006 2004 2003
September 12, 2006
First Up:
Thirty-four percent of Americans admit that they tidy up before the maid comes. The other sixty-six percent say that they take their chances that their spouse won't walk in on them.
Item 2:
Gas prices have dropped about 22 cents a gallon in the past two weeks. Democrats blame The Bush Administration and say, "Put us back in power and we'll tax it back up to all time highs."
Item 3:
Dateline--London, England A pair of panties worn by Renee Zellweger in the "Bridget Jones' Diaries" movie is expected to bring in $185,000 at a charity auction. Items not expected to bring that much include Boy George's bra and RuPauls' Jock Strap.
Item 4:
Dateline--Cheshire, Oregon A woman is in jail for shooting her husband after he shot the couple's pet chicken. When asked why he shot the chicken he said, "She wouldn't let me choke it anymore."
Item 5:
To help stop the dumping of unwanted puppies, Disney has issued a warning in the DVD of "The Shaggy Dog." It explains to viewers why a Bearded Collie may not be the best choice for everyone. In a related story, Liza Minelli's ex-husband David Gest replied, "Amen to that!"
Item 6:
A pilot in Georgia is offering couples that want to join the Mile High Club a package deal: For just $299, they get a bottle of champagne and an opportunity to do it at 5,280 feet. He also has an offer for single guys on a budget: For just $29.95, you get a can of beer, a sock and the top bunk.
And Finally:
The Bing Crosby Joke of The Week An old nun living next to a construction site noticed the coarse language of the workers, and decided to spend some time with them to correct their ways. She decided that she would join them for lunch to sit and talk with them. She packs her sandwich, chips and Ho-Ho in a brown bag and walks over to the spot where the men are eating. She approaches the group, and with a big smile on her face asks, "Do you men know Jesus Christ?" They shake their heads no while looking at each other. After a moment, one of the workers looks up into the steelwork and yells, " Anyone up there know Jesus Christ?" One of the steelworkers yells back, "No! Why?" "Because his wife is here with his lunch!"

Bob Zany's Goodwill Tour Bob Zany's
Goodwill Tour

Click here to see the photos!
2019 Dates
and Venues

Aug. 8
Del Lago Casino
Waterloo, NY
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Aug. 16
Sea Pines Golf Resort
Los Osos, CA
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Aug. 19-25
Laugh Factory
Las Vegas, NV
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Aug. 30-31
The Nugget
Bob Zany in Concert
Carson City, NV
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Aug. 30-31
The Nugget
Taping Carson City Tonight
Carson City, NV
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Sept. 6
Performing Arts Center
Munster, IN
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Sept. 7
Green Acres
Kokomo, IN
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Sept. 8
The Bruin House
Pittsboro, IN
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Sept. 18-22
The Improv
Lake Tahoe, NV
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Sept. 28-Oct. 12
Norwegian Cruise
Out of NYC
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Oct. 18-19
Dry Bar Comedy taping
Provo, UT
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Oct. 22
Throckmorton
Mill Valley, CA
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Nov. 6
The Whiskey House
Ankeny, IA
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Nov. 7
L-Treyn's Bar
Keokuk, IA
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Nov. 8
The Capitol Theater
Burlington, IA
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Nov. 9
The Main Event
Mason City, IA
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Nov. 12-17
Laugh Factory
Reno, NV
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Nov. 21

Rockford, IL
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Nov. 22
The Pixy Theater
Edinburgh, IN
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Nov. 23
VFW
Sullivan, IL
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Dec. 13-14
The Grove
Lowell, AR
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Dec. 31
Kwataqnuk Flathead Resort & Casino
w/ Willie Tyler & Lester,
Jimmy "JJ" Walker
Polson, MT
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Jan. 4
w/ Jimmy Walker
Edgeton, WI
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For information: 818-314-9577
Email: abcmess57@gmail.com

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