Click on a year to see the reports: 2008 2007 2006 2004 2003
August 05, 2008
First Up:
Dateline--Dayton, Ohio A woman was arrested at a gas station after begging customers for money and then dropping her pants regardless of whether she received any or not. In a back-at-ya' twist, the men who donated to her cause then begged her to keep her clothes on.
Item 2:
Fun Fact You Should Know The Liberty Bell weighs 2,000 lbs., making it the heaviest American icon on record. The second heaviest icon with a large crack? Rosie O'Donnell.
Item 3:
According to the University of Wolverhampton, the World's Oldest Joke dates back to 1900 BC.: It starts, "John McCain walks into a barů"
Item 4:
Dateline--Ohio A death row inmate says that he is too fat to be executed. According to a prison spokesperson, they are still going to give him the chair, but they're going to charge tax-payers for two seats.
Item 5:
In Olympic News The Iraqi Rowing Team will be allowed to compete in the Beijing Summer Games, after all. Mexico has announced it will not have a team, since all of their best and fastest are currently swimming for the US.
And Finally:
The Bing Crosby Joke of The Week An old man owned a large farm with a pond and fruit trees. One evening, he grabbed his five-gallon bucket and headed to the orchard to pick some fruit. Much to his surprise, he found a bunch of young girls skinny-dipping, and told them sternly to get the heck off of his property. "We're not coming out until you leave," declared one of the swimmers. "I'm not here to see you naked," replied the farmer, "I'm just here to feed the alligator."

Bob Zany's Goodwill Tour Bob Zany's
Goodwill Tour

Click here to see the photos!
2019 Dates
and Venues

Aug. 8
Del Lago Casino
Waterloo, NY
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Aug. 16
Sea Pines Golf Resort
Los Osos, CA
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Aug. 19-25
Laugh Factory
Las Vegas, NV
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Aug. 30-31
The Nugget
Bob Zany in Concert
Carson City, NV
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Aug. 30-31
The Nugget
Taping Carson City Tonight
Carson City, NV
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Sept. 6
Performing Arts Center
Munster, IN
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Sept. 7
Green Acres
Kokomo, IN
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Sept. 8
The Bruin House
Pittsboro, IN
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Sept. 18-22
The Improv
Lake Tahoe, NV
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Sept. 28-Oct. 12
Norwegian Cruise
Out of NYC
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Oct. 18-19
Dry Bar Comedy taping
Provo, UT
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Oct. 22
Throckmorton
Mill Valley, CA
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Nov. 6
The Whiskey House
Ankeny, IA
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Nov. 7
L-Treyn's Bar
Keokuk, IA
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Nov. 8
The Capitol Theater
Burlington, IA
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Nov. 9
The Main Event
Mason City, IA
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Nov. 12-17
Laugh Factory
Reno, NV
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Nov. 21

Rockford, IL
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Nov. 22
The Pixy Theater
Edinburgh, IN
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Nov. 23
VFW
Sullivan, IL
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Dec. 13-14
The Grove
Lowell, AR
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Dec. 31
Kwataqnuk Flathead Resort & Casino
w/ Willie Tyler & Lester,
Jimmy "JJ" Walker
Polson, MT
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Jan. 4
w/ Jimmy Walker
Edgeton, WI
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For information: 818-314-9577
Email: abcmess57@gmail.com

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